What About The Other Sex?
In the Big Book of AA, it’s written: “If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right-about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him.” To drink like a gentleman. To do the right-about-face. To take off one’s hat as a sign of respect or admiration. This language, and these gestures, are marked with a certain brand of masculinity—what could be considered machismo. They carry a tone of posturing, and an adherence to social etiquette is implied. The assumption is that a real, proper man can drink responsibly. In present day, one of the leading producers of beer uses that very motto: “Drink responsibly.”
However, even a cursory, elementary glance at what alcohol is—a toxic liquid—will inevitably reveal the absurdity in the oxymoronic plea to drink responsibly. It’s kind of like saying: “Provoke the rattlesnake responsibly.” Well, maybe an alcoholic beverage doesn’t have venomous fangs, but in a drinker’s life, alcohol can wreak substantially more havoc than a reptile. Similarly, if we said: “Violently kill your enemies in the name of peace,” that would be a non sequitur—a statement or idea that reeks of falsehood. What instruments of death or violence ever bring lasting peace, and what poisons can be ingested responsibly? None.
Such use of language has been called doublespeak, which is the distortion and perversion of meaning in order to achieve a desired result. Like a magician, the purveyor of doublespeak fools its readers or listeners by using a sleight of hand with words. Doublespeak is quite different than a paradox. A paradox occurs when two opposite ends of the spectrum are united in harmony. In AYP, the paradox stillness in action reflects the union of tranquility and ecstasy as spiritual transformation unfolds within the human being. With increased mental and emotional clarity gained from AYP practices, we can discern between true and false, doublespeak and paradox. “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.”
Circling back to these overly masculine overtones, we find that AA has allowed its members to seek conscious contact with “God as we understand Him.” Needless to say, this masculine portrayal of God cuts out half of the equation and limits flexibility. What about God as we understand Her? Fortunately, AYP picks up the slack and provides much material on getting in touch with the divine feminine.
The woman is everything in tantric sex, and in all of life. She is the divine goddess. Everything we see and everything we do is born of the divine feminine. That is why, in this world, she is called "mother nature." It is the divine feminine that attracts the masculine seed of pure bliss consciousness and manifests all. The cosmos and everything in it is born from Her.
A whole new component of spirituality is opened up here. Whereas the Big Book vaguely and ambivalently skims through the topic of sex and women, AYP adamantly and vigorously illuminates the fertile potential of the divine feminine in spiritual development. We can apply this knowledge to our recovery, and to our healing.
If we work with the methods and principles, we can get on the road to sexual healing. What is sexual healing? First, it is not creating more injury. That happens as our behaviors toward the opposite sex become more mature – more nurturing. Second, it is releasing the obstructions built up over ages past, and in this lifetime. It all can be let go using the right-handed and left-handed methods of tantra. Once we are underway, and it is clear to both partners what the journey is, it is a new world. Then who will not be attracted to the love chamber?
In the Christian gospels, it’s written: “Your faith has made you whole.” Following this sentiment, we can pursue a wholesome path of recovery and maturity that is leading towards union of male and female. This way, the gender imbalance and discrepancies are reconciled, and our birthright as divine companions and lovers is restored.